Make an Advent calendar for a friend

An Advent calendar you make yourself is one of the nicest things you can give a friend. It is not about spending much, but about being thoughtful for 24 days in a row. One evening of filling envelopes, and she gets a small moment of kindness every morning.

When and where to make it

Make it in the last week of November or the first days of December. If you start later, simply number only the days left, so she opens one a day until Christmas. Choose an evening when you can sit at a table with some music on, because it takes an hour or two to fill and number everything.

Decide how you will give it to her. You could hand it over in person on the first of December, leave it at her door, or send it by mail a few days ahead. If it is going to arrive in the mail, pack it carefully so nothing breaks.

Not everyone marks Christmas. If your friend does not, you can count down to the end of the year, or simply call it a calendar of small kindnesses.

What to bring

Beyond the envelopes or bags, tiny treats and a pen:

• String or ribbon and clothespins, if you want to hang them up
• A box, tray or basket if you would rather stack them
• Stickers, washi tape or a stamp for decoration
• Paper and a pen for notes
• A few photos you have printed, if you have a printer or a photo kiosk

Choosing what goes in

Aim for variety. If every day is candy, it will be too much, so mix three kinds of things:

• Little treats. A tea bag, a chocolate, a wrapped sweet or a packet of hot chocolate. Check for allergies and dietary needs first.
• Notes. A memory you share, a compliment, a quote you like or a small thing you have noticed about her.
• Tiny ideas. “Go for a short walk today,” “Text someone you miss” or “Put on your favourite song.”
• Small keepsakes. A sticker, a printed photo, a pressed leaf or a bookmark.

Keep everything light and flat so it fits in an envelope. Anything that melts is best saved for a cold climate or kept away from heat.

How to make it

1. Choose your container. Envelopes, small paper bags, little boxes or even matchboxes all work. Pick 24, or the number of days left.
2. Number them. Write a number on each one, in order or at random. Mixing the order makes it more fun to find the next one.
3. Plan the days. Decide which days get the nicest things, such as the weekends, the first day and the last. Put a note in each one, even if it is only a line.
4. Fill them. Put in the items, close each one and tape or tie it shut.
5. Display. Hang them on a string with pegs, pin them to a board, or stack them in a box or basket. Add a small tag with her name.
6. Hand it over. Give it with a note: “One a day, no peeking.”

What goes wrong

• You run out of ideas. Use free things like notes and photos for the middle days. They are often the favourite part.
• The treats melt or break. Choose items that last, and keep them somewhere cool.
• The numbers get mixed up. Number them before you fill them, and lay them out in order.
• It looks messy. Keep to one or two colours of paper, and use string and pegs to tidy it up.
• It costs too much. Set a total limit before you start, and spread it across all 24 days.

After the calendar

On the last day, put in something a little bigger or a note saying what you have enjoyed about her this year. If she liked it, she may make one for someone else next time.

Make it a winter evening

Put on some music, sit at a table with a pile of little things and make something that will start someone’s days well. Once you have finished the calendar, you can wrap gifts in brown paper and twine in the same sitting.